Christmas Decorations in Pubs

Christmas in pubs can be confusing. You could love it but at the same time hate it. Where you sit will usually depend on how recently you were stuck behind a Santa-hatted idiot ordering six drinks and his Guinness last.

But before the novelty jumpers start appearing the first sign of Christmas in a boozer is, of course, the decorations…

Once the Halloween tat is boxed away and November’s gloom settles in, the fairy lights flicker back to life, tinsel appears and plastic Santas materialise above the bar, usually looking mildly embarrassed to be there.

And that is as it should be. 

Slight detour here but for me Halloween decorations in pubs remain baffling. If Halloween is allowed, where exactly do you draw the line?

As I see it there are only two maybe three times decorations are acceptable in a pub. Paddy’s Day, Christmas and around international sporting tournaments. Of course the van driving, Tom Skinner loving, Brexiteers amongst you might be reading this in rage, pointing out St.Georges day deserves a shout…. Back to statue defending with you… 

Christmas in pubs however, and the spectrum of decor is quite something. At one end you have the outrageously overdone, places like the Churchill Arms, dressed within an inch of their lives. At the other, the purely functional and utilitarian Calthorpe Arms. A bit of tinsel, a wreath, and back to the pints.

Personally, I am all for the cheap stuff. Glistening lanterns hanging slightly crooked from the ceiling. God-awful tinsel that would give a rhinoceros a rash, draped around sills and picture frames. That is pub Christmas. It feels a bit last minute and slightly shambolic in the way a proper boozer should be. 

Anything beyond a smiling Santa is where it starts to tip. This is not anti-Christmas. Far from it. November for example is one of the finest drinking months of the year in my books. Dark evenings, no pressure, none of the nonsense. December, on the other hand, brings the Santa hats and a sudden collapse in basic pub etiquette; think single filed queues and asking how much a 10 drink round is in a packed bar before you tap. The decorations you see are rarely the problem. The people are. 

And despite all that, Christmas in pubs is still a good thing. It gets people out. It gets people meeting up. It fills bars on dark evenings when they are at their best. Just keep the decorations cheap, the Santa hats off the punters, and most importantly remember your p’s and q’s!